I’ve been collecting data about myself on a daily basis for the past 3 years. Half a year ago, I switched from using 42goals (which I only remembered to fill out once every few days) to a Google form emailed to me daily (which I fill out consistently because I check email often). Now for the moment of truth – a correlation matrix!
The data consists of “mood variables” (anxiety, tiredness, and “zoneout” – how distracted / spacey I’m feeling), “action variables” (exercise and meditation) and sleep variables (hours of sleep, sleep start/end time, insomnia). There are 5 binary variables (meditation, exercise, evening/morning insomnia, headache) and the rest are ordinal or continuous. Almost all the variables have 6 months of data, except that I started tracking anxiety 5 months ago and zoneout 2 months ago.
I recently defended my PhD thesis, and a chapter of my life has now come to an end. It feels both exciting and a bit disorienting to be done with this phase of much stress and growth. My past self who started this five years ago, with a very vague idea of what she was getting into, was a rather different person from my current self.
I have developed various skills over these five years, both professionally and otherwise. I learned to read papers and explain them to others, to work on problems that take months rather than hours and be content with small bits of progress. I used to believe that I should be interested in everything, and gradually gave myself permission not to care about most topics to be able to focus on things that are actually interesting to me, developing some sense of discernment. In 2012 I was afraid to comment on the LessWrong forum because I might say something stupid and get downvoted – in 2013 I wrote my first post, and in 2014 I started this blog. I went through the Toastmasters program and learned to speak in front of groups, though I still feel nervous when speaking on technical topics, especially about my own work. I co-founded a group house and a nonprofit, both of which are still flourishing. I learned how to run events and lead organizations, starting with LessWrong meetups and the Harvard Toastmasters club, which were later displaced by running FLI.
- Finished paper on the Selective Bayesian Forest Classifier algorithm
- Made an R package for SBFC (beta)
- Worked at Google on unsupervised learning for the Knowledge Graph with Moshe Looks during the summer (paper)
- Joined the HIPS research group at Harvard CS and started working with the awesome Finale Doshi-Velez
- Ratio of coding time to writing time was too high overall
- Co-organized two meetings to brainstorm biotechnology risks
- Co-organized two Machine Learning Safety meetings
- Gave a talk at the Shaping Humanity’s Trajectory workshop at EA Global
- Helped organize NIPS symposium on societal impacts of AI
Rationality / effectiveness:
- Extensive use of FollowUpThen for sending reminders to future selves
- Mapped out my personal bottlenecks
- Tracked insomnia (26% of nights) and sleep time (average 1:30am, stayed up past 1am on 31% of nights)
- Started working on sleep hygiene
- Stopped using melatonin (found it ineffective)
The past few months had been quite nomadic even by my standards. Visiting the MIRI fellows program, EA Global, Alaska camping (in 4 different parks), CFAR alumni reunion, and finally Burning Man. It was an exciting social time – I had many great conversations and coordinated with various people. It was also tiring to keep up with all the schedule changes, packing and unpacking, and my habits fell through the cracks (meditation, exercise and the like). It is a relief to be back at Citadel with all my stuff in one place, in a stable work and social environment. It almost feels like I’d never left.
It seemed appropriate to conclude the wanderings with Burning Man, which was the most like an actual vacation for me. This year was a good combination of spontaneity and scheduling, adventures and conversations.
The CFAR alumni workshop on the first weekend of May was focused on the Hamming question. Mathematician Richard Hamming was known to approach experts from other fields and ask “what are the important problems in your field, and why aren’t you working on them?”. The same question can be applied to personal life: “what are the important problems in your life, and what is stopping you from working on them?”.
Over the course of the weekend, the twelve of us asked this question of ourselves and each other, in many forms and guises: “if Vika isn’t making a major impact on the world in 5 years, what would have stopped her?”, “what are your greatest bottlenecks?”, “how can we actually try?”, etc. The intense focus on mental pain points was interspersed with naps and silly games to let off steam. On the last day, we did a group brainstorm, where everyone who wanted to receive feedback took a turn in the center of the circle, and everyone else speculated on what they thought were the biggest bottlenecks of the person in the center. By this time, we had mostly gotten to know each other, and even the impressions from those who knew me less well were surprisingly accurate. I am very grateful to everyone at the workshop for being so insightful and supportive of each other (and actually caring).